In a post-apocalyptic world, ordinary things like a proper haircut won’t be so regular. After TEOTWAWKI, you’ll have to find one of several post-apocalyptic hairstyles.
We already experienced a taste of life without access to the hairdresser or barber during COVID-19 lockdowns. Social media went literally nuts with the associated memes. People complained on how terrible they looked after more than a month without their schedule cut or style.
The perception of being sloppy and messy actually flooded the web: tons of day-after-day pictures and videos proved it. For some individuals, the comparison between the past and the present was ruthless.
But that said, how could post-apocalyptic hairstyles look? Loose hair or over-complicated? Bald or long hair? Hair coloring or natural?
In this article we will cover different post-apocalyptic hairstyles both for women and men, and why/how/where to wear them.
Factors that Determine a Post-Apocalyptic Hairstyle
Before debating the possible varieties of hairdos, we need to clarify some essential factors that influence our personal way to arrange our styles.
Hygiene Issues – In a post-apocalyptic world, no doubt hygiene will be a matter of concern due to the potential shortage of water, soaps, shampoos, sponges, hair conditioners, and so on. You name it.
Being bald could be the perfect solution to it, but what about in the dead of winter?
Climate – Warm climate regions obviously require more breathability. On the opposite end, your hair can be of great aid to keep you warm in severe weather conditions.
Environment – In areas with thick vegetation, wearing your hair down could be a fatal error. In fact, getting entangled somewhere with vines, thorns, or whatever is a mistake you must avoid.
Scissors and Razors – Any blade could turn into an improvised weapon in a post SHFT scenario, and work as a haircutting tool. Finding scissors and razors designed for the job could be a serious problem. Not to mention all the sharpening tools.
Functionality – With our hair growing, we need to find a functional way to get it under control. This will help avoid any risk of getting trapped, or even strangled inside ruined buildings or the outdoors.
Comfort – A post-apocalyptic world is a traumatic one. We will need to survive in it by establishing some basic, personal standards of comfort. This is utterly important for hairstyles, because they have a lot to do with:
- our physical, general condition
- our personality
Distinctive Marks – If you are part of a community – or of a gang – you may all have the same hairdo as a distinctive mark. It sounds a bit like The Warriors movie, but it is far from being a remote possibility.
The factors mentioned above like climate, hygiene, gang affiliations, and so on should be seen as the elements behind your personal hairstyle’s choice.
Your hairdo, in fact, will become the natural result of your survival decisions. In the early days of a post-apocalyptic world there will be no space for fashion. But as time moves on, survivors will find a way to dress to impress.
Where to Look for Inspiration
Weird haircuts that go into a post-apocalyptic style can be picked up from different sources.
Pinterest – No better place for ideas than Pinterest. In fact, check out the Prepper Press Pinterest page as there are several post-apocalyptic fashion boards.
Movies – Getting inspired by legendary movies like Mad Max, The Road, Omega Man, I am Legend and other post-apocalyptic movies could be a nice way to go. You can try to do them by yourself, if you are good enough.
Comics – The Walking Dead surely paved the road. Nonetheless there are other cool ones like Dead Enders, The Last Americans, Lone Sloane, The Resistance, The Punisher..
Cosplay Events and Larping – Cosplay events are the real thing when it comes to representing a post-apocalyptic world.
Festivals and Events – Extreme events are for extreme people – and extreme haircuts and outfits too! The worldwide-known Burning Man in Nevada is a proof that a post-apocalyptic fashion already exists, and affiliates have no problems in showing it. Also see Wasteland Weekend for further proof.
Fun – Who did never try an odd hairstyle for Halloween? Mixing inspirations to individual creativity can be the ideal ingredients for your Post-Apocalyptic Haircut. Additionally, it could be a good way to test if your hairstyle does really hang on.
How to Give Yourself a Post-Apocalyptic Hairstyle
Start by thinking unconventional, using hairpin accessories like pens, pencils, thin plastic, or steel bars. You can also think ropes, Paracord, and twine. All of these items could become your allies to fix your hair. Rags grabbed and sewed together will become your improvised bandanas.
The most convenient hairstyle in a post-SHTF situation are surely braids:
- French/Dutch Braids
- Single Braids
- Fishtail Braid
- Plait Braids
- Rope Braid
- Crochet Braids
- Lace Braid
- Ladder Braid
- Lattice Braid
These are actually the most popular ones. You can watch some tutorials to apprehend how to make them.
Braids could actually work both for long-hair men, women and children. The tighest they are, the better can last for days.
Where to Wear Your Hairstyle
If you want to give your new PA hairstyle a try before replicating them in an agitated post-collapse world you can try them when you are doing some physical activity like:
- doing fitness and cardio training,
- trekking,
- hiking,
- mountain biking, and
- doing survival and bushcraft activities.
In fact, there are no better circumstance where to test them, considering the possibilities of having your hair trapped somehow, somewhere.
These hairstyles are easy and functional. I like that they can help to hide the fact that you haven’t washed your hair in a week. Because, let’s be honest, that’s a lot more likely than surviving the apocalypse long enough to worry about hairstyles.
27 comments
its the movie thing….havent you also noticed that when men or women wake up in the morning, in the movies or on tv, their hair is also salon fresh and doesnt look like mice have been nesting
At least on “The Walking Dead ” they are dirty and hair looks like crap. I have stored alot of hair ties because i have long hair. So i will braid or put it up in a bun, a bun for to long gives me a headache though.
Oooooooooooh K
Down here in extreme heat and high humidity of Texas Gulf Coast, I think the most practical hair style after ‘Things Go South’ will be extremely close cut hair, very similar to the the Walking Dead character Carol wears. I think ticks and body lice will cause a lot of trouble, and anything that helps you rid your body of infestation will help enormously. Complete baldness invites major sunburn though. Hats with that really like netting let the sun in and take its toll with bald guys.
Well said JL, I know when I wake up when camping out, my semi-longish hair looks like its in ‘Disco 1979 mode’, its a party man, lol! We laugh when we see the photos after the trip is over.
I have this weird condition. Right around the time I turned 40 my hair started falling out.
Now I’m almost bald and I’m certain that it’s George Bush’s fault……sometime it sucks being a stud.
Not that I’ve ever had this problem, but this summer Mrs Jarhead really took care of business. Three things you never want to hear the person cutting your hair say:
1. oops.
2. That was the wrong guard.
3. You like your hair short. Right?
My hair is still less than an inch long and it’s been almost three months since she cut it! My hair hasn’t been that short since bootcamp. In a SHTF situation that’s definitely the way I’d wear it though.
Right on Jarhead,
My survival haircut is a brain surgery candidate.
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Thanks Jarhead,
Respectfully,
Yoda
Does it matter ? women can still have hair that is feminine and not butch dyke . Think of it this way , what did women do during the middle ages , the roman era , etc . etc . ………the way of life then was not very far off the mark on what a lot of people think its going to be like ………and they did just fine , even in the warrior cultures , the women looked feminine . Everybody man or woman is going to look a bit rough ………no big deal , not like NOTHING is going to work …..if you have purchased a solar charger , then you have clippers , you know how to use scissors right ? crap , my GF does hair as a side line , there are simple non mechanical or electrical devices that allow a woman to cut her own hair and make it look good . There are a thousand ways to braid and tie up your hair . I think women will have much bigger concerns if things get that bad …….like protecting their virtue would probably be #1
I would think shaving would be a bigger challenge day to day than the hair on your head . Straight razors are about your only reliable option …………and until you get used to them , they are not easy to use for a novice . Generally speaking , the less hair on your body ….the cleaner you will be , and the cleaner you are , the better chance you have that you wont get disease , parasites , or infections .
the major reason to shave is so you get a good seal with your gas mask…
but yeh, the cleaner you are, the better chance you have.
(especially once the fish and veternary antibiotics run out)
Lololol *gasp* lololol exactly. And dont get me started on the inexhaustible supply of cosmetics
elaine: Are you telling me that the ladies arent stockpiling sealed plastic containers of lip gloss and facial creams!!! Frankly I think most women look better with little or no makeup anyway.
LOL at least you will have a better idea of what you are really getting ahead of time ………..from a mans point of view . But yeah , I personally like it when women use very little makeup …..less is more .
less is definitely more, in the makeup department. dazzle me by who you are, not by what you wear.
Yoda, it’s “Calamity Jane” again. She’s the one that’s not “Jarhead” or “Ranger Man”.
He was replying to Jarheads comment post right above his I think.
I shave cuz I cant stand to be scruffy , not shaving to me is like not wiping after you pinch one off ………..just doesn’t feel right 😉 too each their own ……and if whatever it is works for you ……more power to ya .
Yeh , my wife has been a nurse for 27 years, She keeps her hair real short. I asked her why once she says;”You Don’t EVEN want to know what flys around paitent beds” Haveing lived in the bush for months on end I know why 18th century women wore braids and mob caps .I keep mine “boot camp” short. My little girl(5 1/2) has long hair and its a toatl pain in the morning. (Vals back in NP school so I get Sara ready for school)
I used to date a psych nurse ………she had some stories . All I can say is that there is no way I could do it , but I’m glad there are people that can . God bless them .
hahahahahahahah I figured Yoda was replying to Jarhead’s comment. 😀 I appreciate that you have my back though irish. 😀
… as I’ve mentioned previously, I may not agree with you on everything, but I’d definitely pick you to be on my team.
(see comments to your “youth hunting” post)
😀 Thanks for laughing with me. Sometimes I get tired of the serious posts and have to let y’all in on the commentary that goes through my head. I swear I could write 2 blogs a day on nothing but snark. 😀
probably.
comments go away and come back. a few of mine appear to have gotten lost, because I check back too often: I am SPAM. (spam I am)
I returned to my Boot Camp cut about 5 years ago (about 5 years after I left the Marine Corps). In all likelihood, if TSHTF I’d end up gowing it out a bit. Not by choice, though. My hair just grows too fast. I’ve tried to convince my teen to give up his skater hair, but no dice. The best I’ve gotten is, “When the zombies come, I’ll cut my hair like yours, Dad, okay? Not before.”
My wife cuts her hair, my hair, and our kids hair. She keeps it long but could, in 15 minutes, have an attractive, practical, short cut (2 min in an emergency).
Aye , if I let it go more than two days without knocking it back again , it gets out of hand fast .
Like the character of Glenn Rhee was TWD lol his hair is always perfectly straight or wavy with not one hair out of place even when they’re on the road in season 5.